6 Ways to Be More Resilient During Tough Times

Examples of resiliency are all around us. Athletes who lost limbs but went on to compete again. Survivors of 9/11 who rebuilt from the rubble. Holocaust victims who are living out long, fulfilling lives. Look to your own community for … Read More

sustaining-motivation

8 Ways to Stay Motivated to Follow Through on Your Goals

You may have started setting your goals (congrats!)—and perhaps you’ve even begun the journey. But now, somewhere between the alluring summit and your current progress, you’re experiencing zigzags and hurdles that you never predicted. Your motivation begins to dwindle. Your dreams seem … Read More

The Only 2 Things You Need to Know to Change Negative Behaviors for Good

Why is it that we know what’s good for us—but rarely do it? We know healthy food does our body good. We know the importance of exercise. We know the value of strong relationships. And yet, we can spend countless … Read More

Why We Choose the Mates We Do — and How to Choose The Best Mate for You

Our choice of a long-term romantic partner or mate is one of the most important decisions we make in our lifetimes. Yet sometimes it seems a mystery why we choose who we do. People who on paper should give us … Read More

5 Hacks to Create Powerful Habits

So much of our lives are lived on autopilot. We eat, sleep, go to work, attend to house chores, try to fit in some fun or self-care, or simply wind down in front of the television. Then we begin the … Read More

10 Secrets of Great Relationships

I’ve had the privilege in my 25 years as a couples counselor of working with hundreds of couples. They’ve been old and young, straight and gay, and of various socioeconomic and religious backgrounds. As I have worked with them to … Read More

How to Open Yourself Up to the Moment

Susan, a meditation student, wrote me this: “When I’m feeling disconnected or lonely or anxious, I do my best to remember to pay attention to details. While paying attention does have a calming effect, I realize that paying attention—exquisite, extraordinary attention—is … Read More

5 Situations in Your Life Where You Can be More Present

It’s not easy being present. Our brains, unlike other animal brains, are made for extensive time travel. We can mentally replay the past so well that we smile with joy, or, as is more often the case, drive ourselves insane … Read More

Are You a People Pleaser? Here’s What You Need to Know

5 Psychologist-Approved Ways to Get It Under Control I was recently coaching a client I’ll call Amanda. Although she hated to admit it, Amanda was the office people pleaser. She was always the first one to volunteer for the activities … Read More